Are your friends or family taking their first steps in their adoption journey? Supporting loved ones through this emotional, complicated journey can be rewarding for you and your friends and family. But, sometimes, it’s hard to know how or where to step in and help. As a friend or family member, your support can mean the world. To help you navigate this new role, here are some thoughtful ways to meaningfully support loved ones every step of the way.
Educate Yourself About the Adoption Process
One of the best ways to offer meaningful support is by understanding adoption basics. Take the time to independently read up on different types of adoption, standard terms, and stages of the process. Whether they’re pursuing domestic, international, foster care adoption, or even embryo adoption, each path is unique and can come with specific steps and requirements. Your understanding will make your conversations more empathetic and take your education off your friend or family member’s plate, helping them feel seen and valued.
Be Mindful of Your Language
When discussing adoption, choose your words with care. Avoid asking personal questions about the adoption cost, specific birth family details, or questions that may come across as intrusive. Instead, use supportive language and focus on how you can help. Recognize that specific topics may be sensitive, and avoid assuming any preconceived notions about the adoption process or the birth family. Allow them to share updates at their own pace and avoid pressing for more information than they’re willing to give, respecting the boundaries they’ve set. By honoring their need for privacy and using positive language, you create a safe space for them to open up when they feel comfortable.
Celebrate Milestones Along the Way
Adoption has many vital moments—from receiving approval to waiting for placement to finalizing the adoption. These milestones also tend to ebb and flow with new developments for both birth parents and adoptive parents. Acknowledge, celebrate, and mourn these milestones, whether a small gift, a congratulatory note, or a special dinner. Marking these moments with them can help bring joy and encouragement, showing that you’re excited to be part of their journey and will support loved ones through the highs and the lows.
Be Patient and Offer Emotional Support
The adoption journey can be long and sometimes unpredictable. Be patient and understanding, even if things don’t go as planned. Offer a listening ear, encourage them during uncertain times, and let them know they’re supported no matter what. Being emotionally present can be your greatest gift, helping them feel connected and loved through the ups and downs.
Support Their Transition Once the Adoption is Complete
The adjustment period begins once the adoption is finalized and the child is home. Be supportive during this transition by offering to help however you can, whether continuing with practical help or offering to give the family some bonding time together. Allow them the space they need to adjust and be ready to celebrate as they settle into their new life.
Supporting someone through their adoption journey is a special role. By being informed, respectful, and present, you can make a meaningful difference in their experience and show how deeply you care. Whether through practical help, celebrating milestones, or simply listening, your compassion can add joy and comfort to their journey toward building their family. At Herrin and Leach, we seek to extend compassion in everything we do. We’re here to listen, answer your questions, and ensure your adoption journey is as smooth as possible.